We All Suck Haiku

all bailed today. wow.

we all suck hard, except one:

elisabeth. nice.

Mark, Kim, Tim: We bail.

In an unprecedented move by the younger contingent of the map team, all of the twentysomethings bailed on today’s Mt. Sanitas hike/run/slog. A senior map team official, who granted an interview on the condition of anonymity, said the team had a variety of bad excuses for not completing the Sanitas run today.

“It’s pretty common to hear bad excuses from staffers outside of the GPS Fort,” the senior official said. “But to hear so many from the inside? Well, it’s just changed my whole perspective on the goals of this administration. I feel like we’re just giving lip service to the mountain at this point.”

In the past, the map team committed to climbing Mt. Sanitas every week and even took a page from the longtime postal service creed to claim that “rain nor sleet nor snow nor weak-ass excuses” would stop them from completing the run on a regular basis.

The senior map team official said she hopes the administration will soon hire a Sanitas Coordinator to serve as a demagogue for those who bailed.

“It is clear they need to be either tricked, taunted, or otherwise harassed into climbing this mountain,” the senior official said.

You People Suck Haiku

everyone bailed. you

people really suck today.

no dedication.

Quote of the day

“I never considered doping before I met Sanitas,” Mark said. “But I figured I needed it to survive.

How strong is your heart?

It better be stronger than an OX to run up Sanitas.

Naked, Sanitas, a woman — Seriously folks I can’t make this stuff up

Naked hiker rescued on mountain trail
By Heath Urie
Sunday, December 9, 2007

Boulder County sheriff’s investigators are trying to figure out why a disoriented woman in her mid-20s was hiking naked on a mountain trail in the snow Saturday afternoon.

Sheriff’s Sgt. Kevin Parker said the woman was spotted by another hiker along the Sanitas Ridge Trail about 4:25 p.m. in north Boulder.

“He came across a naked female on the trail, and at 14 degrees, he thought that was an issue,” Parker said.

Sheriff’s deputies and Boulder Open Space and Mountain Parks rangers searched frantically for the woman until finding the woman on the trail about 5 p.m.

Emergency workers brought the woman down the trail about a half-mile to an ambulance. She was transported to Boulder Community Hospital for treatment, Parker said.

Parker said the woman did not have any obvious injuries, and there was “no indication” a crime had occurred. He said the woman has not explained why she was outside in the freezing conditions.

Parker said authorities have identified the woman, but would not release her name because she is considered “a victim.”

The trail the woman was found along connects the Sanitas Valley Trail to the Mount Sanitas Trail about a half-mile west of Fourth Street on Mapleton Avenue.

Send information about news and events to newsroom@dailycamera.com.

Sanitas Zen 2

“When you get to the top of a mountain, keep climbing.”

~ Zen Saying

(Apparently those assholes never tried to run up one.)

Sanitas Zen

“The secret of this kind of climbing is like Zen. Don’t think. Just dance along. It’s the easiest thing in the world, actually easier than walking on flat ground which is monotonous. The cute little problems present themselves at each step and you find yourself on some other boulder you picked out for no special reason at all, just like Zen.”

~ Jack Kerouac

Old Guy haiku

old guys, burdened with

responsibility, can’t

climb with us. suffer.

Ignorance was Bliss

Will running up the north ridge of Sanitas hurt more now that we know the south side is easier?